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Texas Pretending To Lure Gun-Loving, Tax-Hating New Yorkers


By

Christopher Robbins

Published Jan 21, 2013

Modified Jan 21, 2013


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Bring your guns, leave your dignity!

 


By

Christopher Robbins

Published Jan 21, 2013

Modified Jan 21, 2013


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Taking advertising money from Scientology is gauche, but cash from a cult that worships fast food, firearms, and inefficiency is fair game. Shortly after New York passed historic gun control legislation, readers of the New York Times and the Wall Street Journal in Manhattan and Albany were treated to ads placed by Texas's attorney general urging freedom-loving New Yorkers to move to the Lone Star State. "We have no income tax, yet still manage to have a multi-billion dollar budget surplus," the related copy reads. "Use some of that extra money to buy more ammo." You'll need the ammo once Costner's Prophecy comes true and Thirst War I begins.

Texas' Attorney General Greg Abbott is described by the Times as a "gentlemanly yet fiercely conservative litigator eager to challenge the Obama administration." Abbott, a former State Supreme Court Justice, once described his job thusly: "I go to the office. I sue the federal government. And then I go home.” Somewhere in there he acts as Texas' chief law enforcement officer and runs the department of justice, probably.

So what motivated Abbott to run these ads? “It makes the point that Texans value freedom, and specifically their freedom to protect themselves," Abbott's spokesman tells the paper. "Our state has experienced the largest population growth in the country from places like California and New York because our culture does value freedom.”

Like say, the Freedom to run for governor of the state of Texas in 2014? Maybe Abbott knows how to fix Texas' dismal school system, or flimsy mental health coverage, or the fact that it kills innocent, mentally ill people? Either way, Texas sounds like a great place to host our compound of bike lane worshipping, kale-smoking, no-pants-wearing twerk artists. But the rich people are probably staying here.

Tagged

andrew cuomo

gun control

new york

texas


Christopher Robbins

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Christopher Robbins is a New York City reporter covering transportation, affordable housing, local politics, and criminal justice. His work has also appeared in New York Magazine, The Village Voice and The New York Times. Chris is a graduate of Patrick Henry High School in Roanoke, Virginia, and enjoys biking to Fort Tilden in the summertime.

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