Extra Extra: Do the Zoomers know about Jessica Alba?

James Ramsay

Published May 5, 2023

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Jessica Alba at a Knicks game

Michael Simon/Shutterstock

James Ramsay

Published May 5, 2023

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Good Friday afternoon in New York City, where the devil bird has landed. Here's what's happening:

Union painters, business owners and local elected officials said chips of lead paint have been falling from the elevated subway tracks in Bushwick for years, and the MTA hasn't done anything about it.
A company marketing its high-tech carbon capture equipment to apartment buildings has a problem: Their device, which effectively lowers emissions by trapping carbon dioxide and liquifying it before it's released into the atmosphere, isn't one of the approved methods by which a building can comply with New York City's new emissions law.
The NYPD said a 31-year-old software engineer fell to his death from the 14th floor of Google's offices in Chelsea last night.
A Middlesex County, New Jersey resident said their Ring camera caught a neighbor clearing large quantities of pasta out of their deceased mother's house, suggesting that this dry pasta may have been dumped near a stream in Old Bridge and subsequently absorbed a bunch of rain, becoming the now-infamous New Jersey Pasta Piles.
New York Jets star cornerback Sauce Gardner, who's 22, did not recognize Jessica Alba when he sat next to her at a Knicks game this week.
Matt Harvey, the former Mets pitcher who was suspended last season after admitting to distributing oxycodone to a fellow major leaguer who died of a fentanyl overdose, has retired from baseball.
As April showers give way to May flowers, Adrian Chiles is here to remind us that gardening is a relentless, unwinnable war.
CNN canceled Stanley Tucci's "Searching for Italy" travel series, but don't worry, the Tooch is confident the show will return.
In the meantime, Bruno the Goat is the new king of Italy.
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And finally, first one up is king of the tree: