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Photo: Fat Squirrel Scarfs Entire Slice Of Pizza
By
Christopher Robbins
Published Feb 14, 2012
Modified May 8, 2015
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By
Christopher Robbins
Published Feb 14, 2012
Modified May 8, 2015
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We can all cry about how mean those ads in the subway are telling us to lay off the fat and sugar, but when our f*cking squirrels are eating whole slices of pizza without compunction it's safe to say we have a problem. Bwog, no slouch in cataloguing squirrels thinking they're people, published this photo from a tipster taken on Columbia's campus and notes that the "Perp said to be 0'8", brown and grey hair." Also: frequently short of breath, and known to pick up a shake weight from time to time.
Sure this proves that we live in a society of such overwhelming abundance that there are entire slices of pizza just lying around for woodland animals to enjoy. But it also helps to answer a question that has plagued philosophers for centuries: do squirrels eat pizza cheese first or crust first?
Tagged
columbia
fat woodland animals
obesity epidemic
squirrel
squirrel photos
this happened
Upper West Side
Christopher Robbins
Christopher Robbins is a New York City reporter covering transportation, affordable housing, local politics, and criminal justice. His work has also appeared in New York Magazine, The Village Voice and The New York Times. Chris is a graduate of Patrick Henry High School in Roanoke, Virginia, and enjoys biking to Fort Tilden in the summertime.
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