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Food

Review Website Not Pleased About The Chic New FiDi Denny's That Hasn't Opened Yet


By

Lauren Evans

Published Feb 19, 2014

Modified Feb 19, 2014


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The Future.

 

Via Denny's


By

Lauren Evans

Published Feb 19, 2014

Modified Feb 19, 2014


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Not everyone's excited about the new Denny's opening at 150 Nassau Street in the Financial District. Not erstwhile Mayor Bloomberg, not the NIMBYs, and certainly not this agitated writer at NYC.com, whose editorial review of the chain oozes with hatred the way the Fried Cheese Melt oozes fat and carcinogens, and also hatred.

This is an error message. It would seem that you have tried to look up information about the Denny's restaurant in the Financial District, but that can't be right. In a city with some of the best dining options in the world—including actual greasy spoon diners—you're looking up Denny's for one reason or another.

It's important to note that this is an editorial review, not a user review, which seems clear by the author's grasp of basic grammar and general restraint with the caps-lock (though they did botch the spelling of Play-Doh, minus 600 points). You get the sense, though, that this isn't how NYC.com normally conducts business, especially as the levels of existential angst spike precipitously toward the end.

Yeah, it's weird. But the more you think about it, the more real it becomes. This is a reverse Tinkerbell situation we have here. If we simply don't believe, maybe the Denny's will go away. After all, we all clicked our collective heels and the IHOP in the Village was no more.

The arrival of Denny's, while of course disappointing, isn't specifically more offensive than the litany of other depressing developments inflicted on the city every day—every time a crusty old dive bar turns into yet another bank, a hardened East Village punk loses their leather jacket. That's the grim calculus of this place.

But don't fret, Angsty Writer. The Denny's, set to open in May, won't be the same aggressively lit gathering space popular among youths and drug addicts that you remember from Poughkeepsie. This one will have a bar, having on Tuesday won unanimous approval from Community Board 1 to be granted a liquor license. What I mean is, it will be worse. So, so much worse.

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financial district


Lauren Evans

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