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Thanks, Obama! Cops Confiscate "Obamacare" Heroin
By
John Del Signore
Published Dec 20, 2013
Modified Dec 20, 2013
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Courtesy Massachusetts State Police
By
John Del Signore
Published Dec 20, 2013
Modified Dec 20, 2013
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Massachusetts State Troopers discovered a sizable stash of heroin during a routine traffic stop in Northampton earlier this morning. It appears the drugs originated in one of Obama's Kenyan narcotic facilities, because many of the bags of horse were labeled "OBAMA CARE" and destined for nursing homes nationwide. With any luck, your relieved grandparents will forward you this story by the end of the day.
According to Massachusetts police, the trooper pulled the vehicle over for "several violations" and during the stop "evidence of illegal narcotics led to a request for a State Police K9." When dog, Frankie, arrived, he sniffed out 1,250 individual bags of heroin in the vehicle. Four people were taken into custody and charged with narcotics violations.
In addition to the Obamacare drugs, investigators found heroin packets stamped “Kurt Cobain," so now the suspects also have Courtney Love's lawyers to worry about.
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heroin
obama
obamacare
John Del Signore
Originally from the Albany area, John Del Signore has called NYC home since 1995. In addition to his thousands of meticulously-crafted bespoke blog posts for Gothamist, his writing has also been published in The Awl, Deadspin, The Nervous Breakdown, and performed at The Brick Theater in Brooklyn.
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Gothamist is funded by sponsors and member donations
Gothamist is funded by sponsors and member donations
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