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$200 Procedure Will Cure "Blackberry Neck," But Not Loneliness
By
Christopher Robbins
Published Jun 22, 2011
Modified Jun 22, 2011
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By
Christopher Robbins
Published Jun 22, 2011
Modified Jun 22, 2011
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We've known about the affliction "Blackberry thumb" for a while now, but chances are it hasn't affected anyone who didn't deserve it. But what are you doing to protect your dainty neck as it bobs up and down in between sexts? A Midtown salon is now offering a $200 "Blackberry Facial" for those of us who are subconscious about the state of their nape, and a brave Daily News reporter underwent the treatment to see if it made a difference. Symptoms of "Blackberry neck" are wrinkles, soreness, and the inability to just put the goddamn thing down for three seconds while a cashier rings up your pack of Orbit.
A 45-minute procedure that included "a peel with sapphire stones…a hydrating serum, and then some lymphatic drainage," was capped with "20 minutes of LED light and microcurrents, topped off with an oxygen mask." Isn't pressing shiny lights to your neck kind of similar to cradling a Blackberry to your ear with no hands? And we want to hear more about this gentle-sounding "lymphatic drainage." By the end, the reporter's "one faint line" on her neck seemed "fainter," and her "neck had a texture of a flower petal." Of course, according to the salon, you need four or five treatments to really see the difference. And look, your wallet is smoother and thinner than ever before!
Tagged
blackberry
blackberry thumb
facials
Hypochondria
midtown
trends
Christopher Robbins
Christopher Robbins is a New York City reporter covering transportation, affordable housing, local politics, and criminal justice. His work has also appeared in New York Magazine, The Village Voice and The New York Times. Chris is a graduate of Patrick Henry High School in Roanoke, Virginia, and enjoys biking to Fort Tilden in the summertime.
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