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Married Men Get Discounts at Hooters!

John Del Signore

Published Feb 17, 2011

Modified Feb 17, 2011

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John Del Signore

Published Feb 17, 2011

Modified Feb 17, 2011

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[VITAL UPDATE BELOW] In the forthcoming Farrelly brothers comedy Hall Pass, Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis play two faithfully married men whose wives (Jenna Fischer and Christina Applegate) are so fed up with their leering at other women that they grant their husbands a one week NSA "hall pass" to get all the fornication out of their systems. Complications ensue, and a troubled nation roars with carefree laughter! To celebrate what will surely be Hollywood's greatest comedic byproduct since Marmaduke, the well-endowed chain restaurant Hooters appears to be offering a unique promotional discount to the married men of midtown.

According to this advertisement, which was spotted by Midtown Lunch, Hooters will be offering a sliding scale discount to married men ALL. NEXT. WEEK. Husbands who've been married 0-10 years get 10% off their bill, those who've celebrated 10-20 years of marital bliss get a 20% discount, and men who've made it past level 20 years get a whopping 30% discount! If we'd known about this deal, we would have gotten married a long time ago.

But how exactly will the married men prove this? (One Midtown Lunch commenter wonders if "an ulcer proof enough"?—hey-oh!) Well, we called up the Hooters on West 56th Street to find out if married men will be required to sneak their wedding licenses out of the bedroom safe in order to save money on objectifying women. But no one at Hooters knew what the hell we were talking about. In fact, assistant manager Scott Embbry tells us, "This is the first I've heard of it. I'm going to have to check with the General Manager. And he's in Florida!" [See update below.]

Not an ideal time for the GM to take a vacation—come Monday morning there's going to be an mob of fixed-income married men at the gates hungry for their Hooters. And then next month, a mob of angry wives who've opened up the credit card statements, like this angry woman who never gave her husband a hall pass to visit the Hooters in Milford TWICE. She confronted him about it, and her story is actually not very funny, so it probably has a lot in common with Hall Pass:

So My internet Friends, here's my question - what do you think and any advice? Am I over-reacting ( I know I more than most likely am ) and YES - I do have major self-esteem issues... I went to Hooters once with my Husband when we were dating and I was thin, beautiful and probably could've gotten a job there if I wanted... but I STILL hated every second of being in that restraunt... in fact we almost broke up over it.... NOW, it's about 7 years later, we have 2 children and I am beyond self consious about my body and the way I look... Child Birth wasn't forgiving to me and my body has never looked anymore grosser and disgusting in my life... Why would my husband go there if he new how much I hated the place? I feel really emotionally betrayed in a way, and I know it's over some "Restraunt" and I know it's not like he went to a Strip Bar - but seriously in my eyes, he may have just as well have.... Help if you can....?

Update 2:21 p.m.: Embbry called us back to confirm that the advertisement is real and they will be honoring the discounts. But when pressed on how the establishment will verify the customer is married, and for how long, Embbry demonstrated an impressive faith in the probity of Hooters' clientele. "The honor system, I guess," Embbry told us. "Show us a wedding band." As if it's impossible to find a ring, attach it to your finger, and take Hooters for a ride. We also pointed out that a wedding ring doesn't grow rings on the inside like a tree telling you how old it is.

"Well, if you say you've been married 30 years, we'll be able to tell if you're old enough for that to be true," Embbry reasoned. But what about arranged marriages? In some countries people are married as young 12, and suppose a youngish-looking thirtysomething who was married in his tween years visits Hooters for the discount. Would Hooters deny him the "hall pass" based on his age? At this point, Embbry declined to answer further questions, explaining that he'd need to call the General Manager in Florida again, and would get back to us. We'll update when we hear from him, or after we visit Hooters on Monday.

Tagged

breasts

hall pass

hooters

marriage

John Del Signore

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Originally from the Albany area, John Del Signore has called NYC home since 1995. In addition to his thousands of meticulously-crafted bespoke blog posts for Gothamist, his writing has also been published in The Awl, Deadspin, The Nervous Breakdown, and performed at The Brick Theater in Brooklyn.

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