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Darth Vader Bank Robber Not Your Average Star Wars Nerd
By
John Del Signore
Published Jul 23, 2010
Modified Jul 23, 2010
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By
John Del Signore
Published Jul 23, 2010
Modified Jul 23, 2010
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The Long Island bank robber who disguised himself as Darth Vader wasn't afraid to use force. Witnesses tell Newsday (paywall) that when Vader entered the Chase bank in Setauket, everyone thought it was just a gag. A muscular customer at the counter jokingly tried to put his arms around Vader, at which point the 6'2" former Jedi threw him to the ground, pointed the gun at him and said, "I'll shoot you in the face. This isn't a joke." And for the first time in history, a grown man in a Star Wars costume successfully stopped people from laughing at him.
Turning back to the counter, Vader demanded cash from the teller. But as he waited for the hand-off, another woman entered the bank. Sensing a disturbance in the Force, he swung around and pointed his gun at her, declaring, "Not today, lady. Find a different bank." Grabbing the cash, he took off running east, knocking over a bagel shop customer who was as clumsy as he was stupid.
An Air Force veteran inside the bagel store who saw Vader run by tells Newsday he thinks the thief has military training, observing, "He knows what he's doing with the gun. He wasn't holding it like a cowboy." Suffolk county police have made no arrests, but they have dispatched one of their best rookies to the Dagobah system to dig up leads.
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Darth Vader
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John Del Signore
Originally from the Albany area, John Del Signore has called NYC home since 1995. In addition to his thousands of meticulously-crafted bespoke blog posts for Gothamist, his writing has also been published in The Awl, Deadspin, The Nervous Breakdown, and performed at The Brick Theater in Brooklyn.
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