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Armed Robbery in Midtown a Real Smoothie
By
Billy Parker
Published Feb 22, 2009
Modified Feb 22, 2009
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By
Billy Parker
Published Feb 22, 2009
Modified Feb 22, 2009
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The Jamba Juice at 5th Avenue and 42nd Street was robbed at gunpoint yesterday morning. The robbery was a case of (peach) perfection with cops arriving in time to spot the assailant, but not able to capture him when he fled as swiftly as a (strawberry) surf rider. During the robbery, two employees on duty were given a (protein berry) workout as the robber, described as a six-foot tall black man, (chocolate) moo'd them to the back room. He then cleared out the cash register and safe while he likely achieved a state of (strawberry) nirvana. Despite being armed, no (wheatgrass) shots were fired and the thief can now only hope for some form of immunity (boost) if he is caught.
Tagged
armed robbery
jamba juice
puns
silly
Billy Parker
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